What goes around has GONE around…so when’s it COMING around?
My little Kids Friend (who I think I’ll call Beetle) and I have spent our first hour together, getting to know one another. I really know nothing about Beetle, except that she needs some time out. I guess that’s the way it should be – no preconceptions.
Gucci as usual is the ambassador between worlds, allowing herself to be cuddled and stroked with the indiscriminate tact of a born diplomat. Beetle, Ms M and I went for a swim, during which I dragged out my rusty skills for wooing eight year olds (‘Let’s have a race…ooh, you beat me..AGAIN!’. Ms M watches all this with incredulity. ‘What are you running for, mum, Best Actress in Pool?’ Afterwards she asked in a low, shocked voice ‘When I was that age, did you talk to ME that way?’. Well, a bit. But then my kids were both brighter than me, at eight.
This actually has nothing to do with the subject, but whatever..
I’ve also suddenly realised how many things I’ve subscribed myself to. $20 a month to free captive bears in foreign lands (probably supporting a thriving market in capturing bears). $30 a month to UNHCR (those people in the mall caught me off guard). $10 a month to help the Humane Society advertise against factory farming. $80 a month to kids in Africa, who are both called Samuel. The Big Issue almost once a month?
Plus I’ve made an extra effort to leave a nice taste in the profiles of people I meet on the internet. Not maybe as sweet as Deliberately Delicious, but then who could be.
Like a cargo train loaded with Christmas treats, all this has presumably trundled its way around the circular tracks of karma, and here I am waiting on the station, wondering when exactly I’m going to see the returning headlights. So far this year, life’s handed me the perfect job, but I can’t say I’ve noticed any other marked improvement…my mum’s died, my love life’s stagnated (partly due to increased pickiness and a refusal to ‘use’ anyone) and I haven’t yet penned a best seller.
Still, who knows how much worse it could have been if I hadn’t cleaned my act up this year. Reminds me of that old joke about the guy who’s stuck on his rooftop in the Queensland floods. A raft, a police boat and finally a helicopter come to rescue him, but each time he waves them away. ‘No thanks – God will save me!’ he says. As the waters eventually sweep him off the roof, he cries ‘God, why have you abandoned me!’.
‘Bloody hell, I sent a raft, a police boat and an effing helicopter – what else do you expect, you dickhead!’.