Yes, I will LITERALLY die without the internet!

Not long ago, my partner and I had a discussion, which went roughly like this.

Me: Our solar system is on its last legs (Note –  I don’t mean that solar system that surrounds earth like a starry womb, holding us close in its galactic embrace. I mean the solar panels that supply all – and I mean ALL – the energy at our home.)

Him: Oh well. No need to panic.

Me: Yes there is! If we don’t have power, we don’t have the internet, and I NEED the internet. I will literally die without the internet!

Him: Really? Literally?

Me: Creatively speaking. I need the internet to write my novels and, more importantly, to market them. Without the internet, I, the author, am nothing! I can’t work.

Him: Didn’t someone write to Bill Gates once asking for money for a computer – he said he couldn’t write great novels without one. And Bill Gates wrote back saying Jane Austen didn’t even have a typewriter – so no.

Me: That was then. This is now. No publisher accepts typewritten manuscripts – they have to be emailed. You can’t upload a sheaf of papers to Amazon. You can’t advertise your e-book to the world in the local paper (not that it’s interested in my e-book anyway, I tried).

Him: I spent twenty years living in a shearing shed on 200 acres with only a rusty bucket and a pedal powered VCR. What YOU are, is a princess!

Obviously, I will get my way, because I always do. No poo-powered satellite connections for me, thank you very much.

How about you. Like me, will you (virtually) die without the internet – or can you not be arsed, really?

14 Comments

  1. My brain would wither and die witout the internet. It keeps me informed, active, annoyed. It makes me laugh sometimes and mainly creative.

  2. I am currently mostly living in my bedroom, with little to no human interaction besides my husband (and a best friend who pops in to drink my tea and talk about Doctor Who) because I’m a great big idiot who managed to break my hip four weeks ago. Without the internet I’d not be able to speak to most of my family, or any of my friends, and I’d fall desperately behind in the tarantula hobby. Worse yet, I wouldn’t be able to order any. A lot of my friends are huge readers, so I would also miss out on hearing about fun new books to try.

  3. As much as I would like to escape the internet some days, I can’t imagine living without it. On the other hand, I’d get a lot more books read if I didn’t do so much online. My to-be-read list is ridiculously, impossibly long.

      1. I love to read, but I don’t have nearly enough time for it. Thirty minutes here. Thirty minutes there. That’s why my to-be-read list is still so long. Sigh.

  4. We have to be connected at work. At home, I suppose I could write without it and watch movies I already own, but it would be difficult to break habits of looking up bits of data, definitions, lyrics, quotes, locations, etc. while writing to make sure I’m accurate. I’d miss blogs and twitter and news 24/7 for sure. I’d get disconnected from friends and family with only the occasional phone call. THIS IS MAKING ME SAD!

    1. I so don’t want to make you sad. I look up stuff for my books online…how else could I write about Jerusalem despite never having gone there.

    1. I think you may be a closet caveman. But think about this… people can’t hit you over the internet, and if they do you can always turn the damn thing off.

  5. I could go without it and I think in some ways we were more connected when we didn’t have it. It’s required all the time now though and I need it for work. It’s great for looking things up too. In the end I guess it’s a mixed bag. 🙂

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