Morning thought bubbles

For a person who’s always talking to herself (in her head), it’s weird that when I sit down to write a blog post, I often find I have nothing to say. Or I do, but I can’t make up my mind to say it. Will you hate me if I say this or that? Am I lecturing you (as I’m wont to do)? Should I make a list instead? People like lists! Or should l try to tell you something you don’t know about, say, the menace of trolls to Icelandic tourism? (But then, you know so much more about that than I do. And anyway, I don’t like facts – they get in the way of a good story.)

So, well, here are some of the things that have crossed my mind this morning…and to hell with it.

Me Too. I get Me Too, I really do. And yet…anything which smells of, I dunno, getting onto a bandwagon, joining a movement, makes me instinctively recoil. Sure, let’s out the bigger bastards – and for the little ones, perhaps we could just all learn to say ‘Fuck off mate, in your dreams’? Which leads me to (me too?)…

Victim culture. Is it just me, or are we all much keener to join the ranks of ‘people who’ve been done wrong by’ nowadays? My theory – before the late 20th century, victims were generally blamed, sneered at and ignored. Now it’s a coveted state, in an era when we all want attention and sympathy. Is that a good thing (personally, I prefer to think of myself as ‘tough’)? Or am I just wrong?

Horses. Last night I declined to watch an undercover expose of the wretched rejects of the horse-racing industry being beaten and turned into dogfood. Are we all going to the races this year? Betting on the Cup? Not me. Let’s boycott the fuckers. Meanwhile, I’m investigating the possibility of adopting a ‘death row’ racehorse or two (the main issue for me is that I’m not sure I have enough cash to cover vet bills, which, for large animals, tend to be substantial).

Do you write? And if you do, do you ever wonder, is this really worth saying? I mean, sure, we can tell a good story – but are we actually giving our readers an insight into anything that matters? Are we helping them to deal with the inevitable human quest for meaning? To get over (or into) a love affair? To feel more empathy for the ‘other’ – different races, sexualities, species? Do you ever ask yourself, ok, I can wield a keyboard – but do I actually have anything important to say? Does it matter? Does it matter to you?

And what do you think of, when you’re thinking and wondering and turning it all over in that amazing organ of yours, the human brain?



  1. I also get a kind of tired about all those hypes linked to human sexuality. Especially those who’re emanating from Hollywood or Washington. People jump into a snakes’pit and then complain they’re getting bitten. I feel more empathy with those racing horses you described in your story.

      1. Yeah, the lynching mob is definitively out to get Harvey, although I doubt he did something others didn’t. He just overdid it and then you get a fair amount of (would be) actresses who didn’t make it, despite having been laid by the old goat. And then you get complaints. If they can’t get the fame, they want at least a chunk of his money. It’s an old wisdom that most lawsuits are only brought where money is to get. Give me the horses.

      2. Not sure I agree. I do think the actresses in question were treated badly, assaulted in some cases. But yeah, a lot of stuff is a question of follow the money

    1. Thanks Peter. My question is, what impact do you want to have? Do you simply want to be read and enjoyed…a reasonable goal…or do you want to convey something important? I want to convey something, I’m just not sure what or how! Ironic🙂

    2. I, too, write without setting the world on fire with it, but also do it just because I must. I do it to get it out of my head, even if what comes out is not exactly what was going on in there -:)

  2. I mostly write fiction because otherwise I do obsess a lot about what I say. I used to blab waaay too much on my old blog (now archived) about personal stuff as well as political and other opinions. My hits were 3x as high, but even so… not a great idea!

    I agree that people should toughen up. At the same time, bullies suck. But they will always exist. Best to learn how to live in a world with them, rather than whine for someone else to smack them, which is generally ineffective anyway.

    1. Did you used to get trolled? I mean it is risky… anything you say may be held against you. I’m with you about the bullies. I feel that for centuries women have been’the weaker sex’, the delicate sweet creatures who have to seek man’s protection against the world’s wickedness. But maybe it’s time for us to rise up and flex our biceps and protect our damn selves. Of course there are plenty of caveats to that… not all situations allow, not all of us are capable, and the law exists to protect us all, male and female.

      1. It’s hard to troll me because I used to be a Usenet Flame Warrior lol. But it does get tiresome. To constantly be on guard and think about repercussions. Honestly, when I was married to a lawyer and knew someone would always have my back, I didn’t care as much. Now, I’m much more mindful. I don’t want to attract a bunch of MAGA bullies to my blog by making an offhand comment. Or a pile of PC police either.

      2. A flame warrior, wow! But then, what can the online indignants do really? As long as one’s remarks aren’t suable…in which case, lawyer love is a wonderful thing.

  3. Haha – brilliant! Sometimes I go from “this is a great thing to write about” to “this is a stupid thing to write about” in a minute – lol! I read a good book by Catherine Deveny called ‘Use Your Words’ about this very thing, and how to just get over ourselves, even though we don’t ever really get over ourselves. I personally don’t like Catherine Deveny, because she outed herself as a vegan-hater (which may make some people love her), so it galls me to recommend her, but I have to admit that I did get a lot our of her book. Bah!

    1. Oh yes, so do I. Like, why are you continuing to bang this keyboard when really, what’s on the screen is, so what? And I’m with you about the vegan haters, the vegans are at least trying to reduce the suffering us humans cause, what’s not to admire? I’ve never read Catherine deveny, I’ll have to give her a go.

  4. This is a great post!!

    I remember when MeToo was trending across social media and I felt bad, guilty, for feeling irked each time I saw someone on fb or some place like that announce it to the world that they, too, joined the masses. It doesn’t take away your pain if you believe it (or in the cause) when you don’t participate…and I rarely do.

  5. I think. What a funny way to start a response. The blame game is not always a cop-out. Many people carry grief that has had no easy outlet. If by speaking years after the event it is the only way to heal a life then that seems fair. The voiceless now causing embarrassment create the havoc needed for perpetrators to think of the consequences before they act. Too late for some – so what?

    Horses. Beautiful beasts burdened by their ability to run deserve better than the knackers for their service. But their fate is ultimately the fault of this nations addiction to gambling. You bet!

    To write is personal. We can choose what we read, but what we write is a personal drive. (I don’t know why I write, perhaps it is to provide a future voice from the grave. Is it a chance to say, I lived, and loved, to a future generation.)

    Thanks for your prompts.

    1. No, I agree, it’s quite legitimate in many ways. My comments are in some ways more about me than the movement… I’m a born separatist and I don’t like mobs, even ones with legitimate reasons. If you don’t think twice about perpetrating harassment now, you’re too thick to live. As for your comments on writing, yeah, I also feel like we’re trying to leave a footprint in the sand.

  6. Regarding the Me Too movement and victimhood … yes, we have become a world in which victim status is more important than just going out and getting it done. I’m really getting kind of tired of the whole thing and it’s one of the reasons why, after a lifetime as a Democrat here in the ol’ USA, I changed my registration. I’m done with the endless victimhood.

    As for writers and writing … I’m struggling with this very same question, but at the end of the day. Why do I write? Because there’s a story in my head I think people might enjoy. Or, at least, I want to see if they would enjoy it.

  7. I so agree with you about the victim mentality out there. Omg how do you feel empowered to live your life as you choose if you cling to the poor helpless victim persona? I don’t get the attraction.

    1. I don’t like the idea of victimhood personally, but sympathy and attention is pleasant, so I get it. I just think it’s more empowering for women to get out from under and kick testicles. Metaphorically. Or…not.

      1. My thoughts exactly. But it’s not just women. I know so many men right now who are totally helpless to address anything in their lives because of this victim mentality. It is just so prevalent and so frustrating.

  8. Although I think outing bullies and/or a toxic culture by speaking up about the damage they cause, I also think that some people do play on their victimhood as a way of getting what they want by trying to make others feel bad. Women and men can both do this, although women have traditionally been more victimised by men and male culture, than the other way round. There are men who still tend to think that if life isn’t easy for them, then they can’t see how life favours them over women. I understand this way of thinking, because as a European person, I once couldn’t see this in regards to indigenous people, either.

    1. Yeah, that’s true. You can’t see from the top of the heap how things look from the bottom. The book ‘Look what you made me do’ about domestic violence illustrates the point that even abusers will try to present themselves as victims, if there’s advantage in it.

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