And now we cross to our roving reporter, Cynical Cynthia, as she tries to catch an interview with the elusive Rose about her Week in Karma.
Rose: (flustered, dragging embarrassed teenager with hat over face) Can’t you see I’m in a terrible rush! I’m supposed to be at work already and my kid’s trying to get out of school for the third day in a row! Gimme a break!
Cynthia: Sure but Rose, can I get a quick comment!? Have you done anything good this week?
Rose: Well, this new job, it IS for a non-profit charity! For old people!
Cynthia: Is it true that you called the Executive Director ‘some random old guy’ on your first day, and referred to the clientele as ‘old biddies’?
Rose: NO! I mean..well, not exactly. I did ask him if his daughter was middle aged. And she turned out to be 21. It was a little awkward. As for the ‘old biddies’ I can categorically deny –
Cynthia: And what do you have to say to the allegation that you ranted to your mum about how stupid someone was for a good half hour earlier this week?
Rose: Er, yeah, um – what’s become of Innocent Until Proven Guilty! What is this, trial by media? Anyway, this person IS stupid!
Cynthia: So not so karmic after all, Rose? Did you do ANYTHING right this week?
Rose: Oh god what time is it…er, well yes I did do a few things but –
Cynthia: Like what?
Rose: Oh, if you must know, I bought a few novels on Amazon. By self-published novelists.
Cynthia: Oh wow you must be feeling so karmic! I can almost see your halo!
Rose (huffily): Well I do think it’s important to support people who are trying to make a go of it. I mean, if I write novels and self-publish them on Amazon and expect people to read them, then I should do OTHER PEOPLE the same favour! Not just read the big boys and girls. Right?
Cynthia: Right. And your novel’s sold how many copies??
Rose: (slams door of car on Cynthia’s trailing microphone, screeches off into distance)
Chaos is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence.