When I was a kid – say, from about five (kindergarten) to around 16 – other kids used to point and say rude things (just hang on a sec while I break out the violins).
Anyway, when I was 5, these two little girls – one of them was called Wendy, I think – came up to me as I sat in the playground moodily munching fairybread, and said ‘We want you to come with us, we’ve got something to show you.”
So, having nowhere else particularly to be, I innocently got up and followed her down to the end of the playground, where a row of little girls sat waiting to begin their carefully rehearsed performance. When I got there, they all began to sing, like a row of budgerigars,
We hate Rose Y, we hate Rose Y
and so on and so forth, the lyrics were fairly simple – till I turned my back and marched back up the playground, wondering what I’d done to deserve all the attention. At least, that’s the way I remember it.
When I told this story to Ms M one day, she said she wished SHE’d been at my infant school, so she could have told them a thing or two (or punched them out). Thank you very much, kind Ms M!
Still, it got me thinking, if you were to go back into some situation like that, knowing what you know now, what witty put downs would you whip out to suit the occasion? Like, say:
Great, well actually I don’t like you much either you obnoxious little brats and by the way, say cheese, you’re going to be viral on YouTube by this time tomorrow morning!
Alright, granted, not THAT witty. Anyway I couldn’t have said that cause they didn’t HAVE YouTube, let alone mobiles to record stuff on. But really – what do you WISH you’d said, if only you’d thought of it?