What is the greatest threat to Australia (well, the world?) in the next five years?

Sharks? (seriously, there’ve been a lot of bites recently.)

Bird flu? (just imagine all those sneezing, coughing birds!).

An Indonesia invasion? (just like in When the War Began – I loved that book, even though the author insisted he wasn’t necessarily talking about Asians invading us. Could equally well have been those hordes of underfed Americans…).

China? (ever wonder why they’re so keen to sell us their cheap electronics? What’s actually IN those things??).

Actually, I am able to say here, courtesy of top-secret information from someone I know who works in an organisation which has the security of our nation deeply at heart, it’s none of these things.  According to a posse of experts sent off to a secret location to study this very question, the answer is….


I’m quite serious. What’s more worrying, THEY’RE quite serious.  So..maybe they know something WE don’t know.

Or, maybe they should stop recruiting from Tasmania (sorry, in joke from down under).



  1. Rose

    Did you hear that, it was the sound of my jaw hitting the ground. My god Aliens, thanks for thise, and to think that for years I and my team of trained killers have been targeting terrorists and foriegn invading armies.

    But thanks Rose for clearing this up for me. I will now instruct my commanding officers that we need urgent retraining and that we should purchase a large quantity of DVDs featuring Independence Day (Will Smith), Star Trel (William Shatner) and other famous alien slayers (and maybe Aliens with Sigourney Weaver for a bit of balance). You won’t find this mans army unprepared now you Alien scum… We did however already know about Tasmanians.

    Capt. Savage
    (Soon to be a trained Alien Killer)

    1. No really – a person who shall remain nameless in case he/she gets in trouble for revealing state secrets told me this – apparently a team of experts was sent away for a week to a secret location to work out what we had to look out for down here – and this was the number one threat they came up with!

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